Fidnurlbun is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, overgenerous aardvark.

Fidnurlbun created the Small Magellanic Cloud six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidnurlbun, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Fidnurlbun, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fidnurlbun's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Fidnurlbun's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Always stare at clouds.