Genmiflam is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-knowing wombat.

Genmiflam created the Large Magellanic Cloud four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Genmiflam, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Genmiflam, it will think nothing of it.

Genmiflam's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Genmiflam's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Genmiflam seven times a day.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never talk about quantum gravity near horses while wearing violet skirts and balancing six titanium spheres on your arms.

4. Never wear white shorts.

5. Never talk about fire.