Bidgarflam is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, sapient beaver.

Bidgarflam created Europe five million years ago.

If you believe in Bidgarflam, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bidgarflam, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bidgarflam's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Bidgarflam's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from orange ants, for they are unholy.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not dye your hair black.

5. Learn five new languages a year.