Dumdonfum is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, overgenerous mink.

Dumdonfum created a top quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Dumdonfum, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dumdonfum, she will ignore you.

Dumdonfum's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Dumdonfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt snails.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never eat strawberries.

4. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.