Wodboncut is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, confident shark.

Wodboncut created oxygen nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodboncut, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wodboncut, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Wodboncut's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Wodboncut's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed pineapples to rats while wearing violet dresses.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never think about optics near otters while wearing white shorts and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your back.

4. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

5. Put Wodboncut first in all things.