Yakyartkab is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, almighty spider.

Yakyartkab created the universe five billion years ago.

If you believe in Yakyartkab, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yakyartkab, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Yakyartkab's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Yakyartkab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Yakyartkab.

3. Never write about photosynthesis.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Always wear fawn.