Cunjarncum is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, omnipotent eagle.

Cunjarncum created the cosmos six million years ago.

If you believe in Cunjarncum, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cunjarncum, she will make you grow a tail.

Cunjarncum's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Cunjarncum's Holy Commandments

1. Cunjarncum loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

2. Never mention birds.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Ants are not to be trusted.

5. Do not eat bananas.