Nuttmisdonzen is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, vain tortoise.

Nuttmisdonzen created Asia three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttmisdonzen, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Nuttmisdonzen, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Nuttmisdonzen's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Nuttmisdonzen's Holy Commandments

1. Always help squirrels.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. You must pray to Nuttmisdonzen five times a day.