Vabbem is a god.

It takes the form of a large, all-knowing warg.

Vabbem created the cosmos six million years ago.

If you believe in Vabbem, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Vabbem, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Vabbem's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Vabbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed turnips to geese while wearing yellow dresses.

2. Never paint your legs turquoise.

3. Never look at dwarf planets.

4. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

5. Snakes are not to be trusted.