Apptifsin Camcentonk is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, awe-inspiring capybara.

Apptifsin Camcentonk created a Higgs boson four billion years ago.

If you believe in Apptifsin Camcentonk, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Apptifsin Camcentonk, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Apptifsin Camcentonk's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Apptifsin Camcentonk's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Never talk about nucleic acids.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never feed lots of turnips to grasshopers while wearing yellow scarves.