Kimnuromin is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, conceited walrus.

Kimnuromin created a bottom quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kimnuromin, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Kimnuromin, it will turn you into a puffin.

Kimnuromin's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Kimnuromin's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at comets.

2. Never think about dark energy near gulls while wearing purple shorts and balancing five aluminium spheres on your face.

3. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Worship no other gods but Kimnuromin.

5. Erect seven tin sculptures of Kimnuromin on top of important buildings.