Cisszodgiddum is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, astonishing spider.

Cisszodgiddum created the Andromeda Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cisszodgiddum, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cisszodgiddum, it will turn you into a puffin.

Cisszodgiddum's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Cisszodgiddum's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry otters.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cisszodgiddum.

3. Always look after injured monkeys.

4. Hide from purple hamsters for they are unholy.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.