Nurpaklig is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, selfish coyote.

Nurpaklig created the Virgo Supercluster two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurpaklig, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nurpaklig, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Nurpaklig's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Nurpaklig's Holy Commandments

1. Nurpaklig loves turtles, so they must be respected.

2. Do not eat pineapples.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nurpaklig.