Tenkabman is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, loving beaver.

Tenkabman created tapeworms three billion years ago.

If you believe in Tenkabman, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Tenkabman, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Tenkabman's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Tenkabman's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three voles approach from the south.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Run away from white whales, for they are unholy.

5. Do not drink alcohol.