Quamhotlib is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, compassionate turtle.

Quamhotlib created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quamhotlib, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quamhotlib, he will turn you into a worm.

Quamhotlib's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Quamhotlib's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always look after injured foxes.

3. Do not eat pineapples.

4. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

5. Do not dye your hair cyan.