Lammuthad is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, merciful ferret.

Lammuthad created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lammuthad, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Lammuthad, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Lammuthad's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Lammuthad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Learn nine new languages a year.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not kill goats.