Fasyattcud is a god.

He takes the form of a small, able salamander.

Fasyattcud created the cosmos eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fasyattcud, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fasyattcud, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Fasyattcud's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Fasyattcud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not run in public.

2. Never wear shoes.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

5. Never think about asteroids.