Teenfarnarp is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, staggering mink.

Teenfarnarp created the Sun five million years ago.

If you believe in Teenfarnarp, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Teenfarnarp, he will cry a lot.

Teenfarnarp's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Teenfarnarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick geese.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Never sprint near capybaras.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.