Jopbadgid is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-knowing mouse.

Jopbadgid created a bottom quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jopbadgid, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jopbadgid, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Jopbadgid's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Jopbadgid's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no geese in a room before entering it.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never sing in the presence of tapirs.

4. Never hurt birds.

5. Always pray immersed in water.