Fagqueeggig is a god.

It takes the form of a small, quiet crow.

Fagqueeggig created water seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fagqueeggig, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fagqueeggig, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Fagqueeggig's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Fagqueeggig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair magenta.

2. Do not wear cyan clothing.

3. Hide if five grasshopers approach from the south.

4. Put Fagqueeggig first in all things.

5. Always stare at clouds.