Badlipnarl is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate rat.

Badlipnarl created light two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Badlipnarl, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Badlipnarl, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Badlipnarl's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Badlipnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Badlipnarl loves doves, so they must be respected.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

5. Run away if nine horses approach from the west.