Hotgiggam is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unthinking bee.

Hotgiggam created tapeworms three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hotgiggam, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Hotgiggam, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Hotgiggam's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Hotgiggam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum field theory.

2. Never think ill of sick eagles.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never feed bread to dolphins while wearing hats.

5. Never paint your face red.