Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, grumpy whale.

Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop, she will turn you into a plant.

Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Bigfotcad Femstigbaf Listloopkop's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near turtles while wearing blue ear rings and balancing eight iron spheres on your hands.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate shrews.

3. Never run near geese.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never eat green fruit.