Hotsaskam is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, tiresome dingo.

Hotsaskam created a down quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Hotsaskam, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Hotsaskam, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Hotsaskam's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Hotsaskam's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Worship no other gods but Hotsaskam.

4. Never go into pink rooms.

5. Never wear corsets.