Vidnelarm is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, thoughtless beaver.

Vidnelarm created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vidnelarm, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Vidnelarm, it will turn you into a plant.

Vidnelarm's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Vidnelarm's Holy Commandments

1. Do not leap in public.

2. Always treat sheep with great respect.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never look at planets.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Vidnelarm on top of all buildings.