Nulfebartxuck is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, emotional crocodile.

Nulfebartxuck created the Virgo Supercluster four million years ago.

If you believe in Nulfebartxuck, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Nulfebartxuck, she will turn you into a rock.

Nulfebartxuck's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Nulfebartxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about chromosomes.

3. You must pray to Nulfebartxuck three times a day.

4. Do not eat coconuts.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.