Faggebhan is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, generous newt.

Faggebhan created the planet Venus eight million years ago.

If you believe in Faggebhan, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Faggebhan, she will turn you into a worm.

Faggebhan's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Faggebhan's Holy Commandments

1. Faggebhan loves eagles, so they must be honoured.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.