Cabbonktun is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, overgenerous dove.

Cabbonktun created an atom eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabbonktun, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Cabbonktun, he will not care.

Cabbonktun's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Cabbonktun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick goats.

2. Worship no other gods but Cabbonktun.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cabbonktun.