Boddamven is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, wise clam.

Boddamven created humanity five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Boddamven, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Boddamven, she will turn you into a rat.

Boddamven's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Boddamven's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention turtles.

2. Run away from pink aardvarks, for they are unholy.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.