Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, omniscient cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen created a strange quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen, it will torture you forever.

Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Mitdusstanfonwotdapxen's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cherries to nematodes while wearing coats.

2. Never jump in the presence of turtles.

3. Never feed turnips to cats while wearing gray shorts.

4. Never talk about spacetime near tapirs while wearing violet boots.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.