Wapkadceb Vogligrill is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, omnipotent narwhal.

Wapkadceb Vogligrill created the Andromeda Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapkadceb Vogligrill, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wapkadceb Vogligrill, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Wapkadceb Vogligrill's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Wapkadceb Vogligrill's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about dark energy near ducks while wearing pink jumpers.

2. Never talk about galaxies.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Feed all hungry manatees.