Sigflowbem is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, compassionate bird.

Sigflowbem created an up quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sigflowbem, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Sigflowbem, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Sigflowbem's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Sigflowbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention eagles.

2. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate sheep.

5. Do not make images of living things.