Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, kind clam.

Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim created a quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim, she will turn you into a frog.

Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not take Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim's name in vain.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fodpidbellgun Nelflabkim.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a room before entering it.
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