Matxenomt Fetvancip is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, overgenerous wren.

Matxenomt Fetvancip created gold three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Matxenomt Fetvancip, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Matxenomt Fetvancip, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Matxenomt Fetvancip's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Matxenomt Fetvancip's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never think about dark energy near birds while wearing indigo dresses and balancing seven iron spheres on your arms.

3. Always help foxes in need.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never feed beans to pigs while wearing ear rings.