Cetcimtin is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, tranquil crane.

Cetcimtin created the planet Venus nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cetcimtin, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cetcimtin, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cetcimtin's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Cetcimtin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always make sure there are no bats in a room before entering it.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.