Bassdabdap Gabfasbit is a god.
It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful
goose.
Bassdabdap Gabfasbit created humankind eight billion years ago.
If you believe in
Bassdabdap Gabfasbit, it will grant all your wishes.
If you do not believe in
Bassdabdap Gabfasbit, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.
Bassdabdap Gabfasbit's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.
Bassdabdap Gabfasbit's Holy Commandments1. Always help porpoises.
2. Do not dye your hair white.
3. Never eat bark.
4. Never sprint near doves.
5. Never feed turnips to cats while wearing pink dresses.