Bugwodlen is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, capable mink.

Bugwodlen created oxygen five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bugwodlen, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bugwodlen, she will be mildly annoyed.

Bugwodlen's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bugwodlen's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Bugwodlen loves doves, so they must be respected.

3. Always obey Bugwodlen's priests.

4. You must pray to Bugwodlen five times a day.

5. Never think about optics near goats while wearing black scarves and balancing eight titanium spheres on your chest.