Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, witty jellyfish.

Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag created the Virgo Supercluster two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag, she will turn you into a duck.

Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in holy places.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kip Kopstanpigzagsinflag.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Never think about spacetime near swans while wearing red boots and balancing six zinc spheres on your face.