Loplitfot is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, intelligent cat.

Loplitfot created the Sombrero Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Loplitfot, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Loplitfot, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Loplitfot's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Loplitfot's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never go into gray rooms.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Loplitfot.

5. Never talk about nucleic acids.