Tippitlin Zakraphit is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, resourceful naga.

Tippitlin Zakraphit created viruses eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tippitlin Zakraphit, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Tippitlin Zakraphit, it will throw large rocks at you.

Tippitlin Zakraphit's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Tippitlin Zakraphit's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never think about spacetime.

5. Do not kill bats.