Sabyikmis is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, ruthless alligator.

Sabyikmis created dark matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Sabyikmis, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Sabyikmis, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Sabyikmis' most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Sabyikmis' Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never think about special relativity.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.