Stragyarppodflis is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, fussy bird.

Stragyarppodflis created the planet Mars four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Stragyarppodflis, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Stragyarppodflis, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Stragyarppodflis' most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Stragyarppodflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near whales while wearing blue boots.

2. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Stragyarppodflis in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.