Shavbitbastpon is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unjust tapir.

Shavbitbastpon created an atom three million years ago.

If you believe in Shavbitbastpon, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Shavbitbastpon, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Shavbitbastpon's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Shavbitbastpon's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not dye your hair cyan.

3. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Shavbitbastpon on top of all buildings.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not sit in public.