Tettitofdid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, irritating dove.

Tettitofdid created the Sombrero Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tettitofdid, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Tettitofdid, he will send minions to preach to you.

Tettitofdid's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Tettitofdid's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Tettitofdid on top of all buildings.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never hurt grasshopers.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. You must pray to Tettitofdid seven times a day.