Gubcamlik is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, fussy gnu.

Gubcamlik created a strange quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gubcamlik, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gubcamlik, he will turn you into a duck.

Gubcamlik's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gubcamlik's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Gubcamlik loves snails, so they must be honoured.