Kenlad Didvedbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, narcissistic swallow.

Kenlad Didvedbaf created a photon seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kenlad Didvedbaf, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kenlad Didvedbaf, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Kenlad Didvedbaf's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Kenlad Didvedbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Worship no other gods but Kenlad Didvedbaf.

3. Always help mice in need.

4. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.