Dimtikbast is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic zebra.

Dimtikbast created dark energy six million years ago.

If you believe in Dimtikbast, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dimtikbast, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dimtikbast's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Dimtikbast's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about gravity.

5. Always wear red.