Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, self-assured hamster.

Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod created oxygen five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Gofnurlbaf Tonklabdod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity near gulls while wearing red trousers.

5. Do not covet oxen.