Dissartdad is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, loving swan.

Dissartdad created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissartdad, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dissartdad, it will curse you with boils.

Dissartdad's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Dissartdad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about stars.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Never go into fawn rooms.

4. Retreat if eight doves approach from the north.

5. Never eat figs.