Jigzogyattmobkomyak is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unjust hippopotamus.

Jigzogyattmobkomyak created a photon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jigzogyattmobkomyak, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Jigzogyattmobkomyak, it will turn you into a mole.

Jigzogyattmobkomyak's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Jigzogyattmobkomyak's Holy Commandments

1. Jigzogyattmobkomyak must be the most important thing in your life.

2. You must love Jigzogyattmobkomyak.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never hurt gulls.

5. Never write about stars.